“Burn the bridges, and let the light lead the way.”

Definitely abandoned this tumblr thing over the course of time. It was extremely nice being able to see my brothers creations today at his art gallery. Its crazy how much creativity people have these days, to the point where I didn’t even really understand anything that I saw, heard, or felt at that exhibit.  But, i feel like that was the point. Exploration beyond anything you could ever comprehend or rationalize.  It’s art. No need to get it, just embrace the sporadic complexities/simplicities of whatever it is.

I guess this blog is going to be pretty random, considering I haven’t entirely filtered out my thoughts for the past couple months.  It’s like life just hit me in the face once and I just kept running and it kept hitting me in the face and now I’m finally debriefing and dodging those dam hits. I figure I’ll make topics.

Disappointments:

Many lately, but all in which have provided me insight and a greater outlook on life than anything.  People who have let me down or blamed me for their own problems have caused a great deal of disappointment and bitter resentment.  But, i’ve realized that I’ve been caring about the people that don’t even appreciate the fact that I exist.  Something in that equation is utterly disproportional.  Why give in so much energy when they could give a fuck if your annihilated in Canada? I’ve learned to appreciate people who actually care a lot more and focus on that.  And, reciprocate the bond to those who will be there. NOT just say they will, and really they wont. 

Expectations:

Many that have exceeded beyond what I ever thought would happen in life.  Many that confuse me.  I guess at this rate I’m taking every stumble as an appreciation for something I’m going to learn from and grow from.  This new job is a burning pain, especially waking up at wee hours and my body hating me for hours while im downing endless cups of caffeine in my system.  However, I’m learning more and more each day, and eventually will become used to the routine of “adult” life. Here we go. 

Ok screw the categories.  I have so much on my mind. It’s a chaotic mess. That, is, life.

I guess what I’m really trying to say is.  Everything changes.  And nothing is for sure. Like I hate eating mushrooms, but who knows tomorrow I might want to eat an effing mushroom (not likely).  That life is about making decisions and have experiences that will bring you closer to certainty, just so you become more uncertain again. That is ok, that is life.  You never know for sure.  It’s just a matter of continuing and enjoy the moments that you so greatly seize with joy and despising the moments when you obliterate yourself with hate. Enjoy to enjoy some more and despise to despise some more.